127: Small Things Are Good For Your Wellbeing

Posted on by notyouraveragegirl363042

Now that I’m getting out more (exercising I mean) I’m getting a lift to my day. I am using the old canal towpaths as many of us do, as a reliable route. I’ve found running by the water gives me more energy. Tramping dirty noisy town centre streets does nothing for me. Mixing with nature, and peace and quiet is what inspires me. I live in a shitty town centre with shitty people and I need reminding there are nice things in the world.

I’ve chosen this as my exercise of choice because paying for a gym is an unnecessary expense. It’s also soul destroying. nd noone talks to anyone. It’s never a social occasion. And I need something that pushes me. No pain, no gain has been a motto throughout my life. The goes for relationships too.

No matter how many people are at the gym, you never ‘meet people’ at the gym. Out on my runs everyone says hello to everyone else. I get to chat to dogwalkers, runners and ramblers alike. Everyone is polite, everyone is out there for the same reason. It’s a team effort. If I say hello to 20 people and get to cane my endorphins for a few hours in the process, I come back a little more enlightened. Happier. In control. At the gym, everyone has their headphones on. Everyone is focused on the calorie counter in front of them.

My social life is small, so little things like this are hugely important for me. I can’t be done with sitting on a sofa in front of crappy television feeling sorry for myself. That’s just not me. And these long runs which I generally do only at the weekend because I don’t have much else to do, make the 48 hours bearable. Fun even perhaps in part because it takes me the rest of the day to recover from it. I am a beginner after all.

29 thoughts on “127: Small Things Are Good For Your Wellbeing”

  2. I have to agree with you there, but I’ve only just discovered it. It’s been a small revelation to me but I have always found water energising and inspiring. I sometimes feel that if I lived by the sea I’d be invincible!

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  5. HELL YEAH! Running is great! Nature is great! Winning combo! I also like running outside to connect with the seasons- the creek looks different in winter and summer etc & really isn’t that what mindfulness is? Being curious and noticing things? So excited for you! Do you have a running goal? Like an ideal distance or speed like mins per km/mile?

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  7. That’s not living next to the sea though. That’s a long drive each way and then a bunch of annoying tourists everywhere for the day. I can think of better ways to spend my day. I’m going to stick to the canals and reservoirs.

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  8. I’m not that familiar with the topography of England. I can name one river.

    You say canals and reservoirs but are there any free running rivers or streams in your area?

    The canals and reservoirs must must be historically old.

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  9. I aim to kill over 300 calories every time I go out. In terms of running I’m just slowly building my stamina. I’m not competitive. I need to lose another 15lbs but I have no real target because it’s a lifestyle change rather than a fix. I can run over 2 miles at once now which is big considering 7 weeks ago I couldn’t do anything. My app lets me know when I’ve hit a new limit though so I can always tell when I’m improving. 🙂

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  12. The reservoirs are mostly victorian. The canals go further back and mostly because of the industrial age so perhaps a couple of hundred years old. They tend to be fed by rivers but it’s all about access too. These places have been carefully managed for good access.

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  14. Oh NYAG, we all are invincible of spirit. I see that when I read your blog…of course it doesn’t always show but that doesn’t mean it isn’t there.

    I’ve gotten through the last 8 months with good friends and a few too many doughnuts but I always new this emotional experience was both temporary and necessary. I read some of your older posts and comments (because you don’t write about it much) and your path has had it’s trips and traps too. It’s hardened you yes, but it has also made you resilient and powerful.

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  21. None of us all one thing all the time. We are complex.

    It is a mistake for people to assume they know everything about me because of my journal or because of the rumors or facts related to my betrayal. Those assumptions reflect more on their lack of curiosity and imagination.

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  23. But lots of people will take things on face value so how do you cultivate it. Sometimes people need spoonfeeding and educating. You don’t want them being that narrow minded their whole lives if there’s a chance for change.

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  24. Is that my job? To spoonfeed them? To convince them? Fuck ’em.

    C, the Interlopers, and even ppl that have known me for 7 years aren’t speaking to me because my betrayal et al distorts everything. It is easier for them to see only the storm then the whole ocean.

    This is, apparently, a quality of an INFP: I see the whole person and disregard the storms.

    For example, a friend said to me about one of the Interlopers: “Sean, you tried to be friends and include him when no one else would. You saw the good in him when all anyone else sees is an arrogant, inappropriate, sexist ass.”

    I have the same issue with C. I understand why she has responded the way she has but as a result I rationalize away my anger…which isn’t healthy for me.

    I just don’t have the energy to help people be less narrow minded.

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  25. No. I think of you as an educator. That doesn’t mean you have to go out of your way for morons. There are lots of people who have no interest in understanding the other person’s take on it. But for those that are receptive to such ideas, it’s a valuable tool. Because by that token you are making people nicer, more understanding and therefore this has to be a help in their lives and their future relationships.

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  27. Ah that explains a lot. To be fair you’ve had to deal with a lot more than the end of a relationship. All the other factors with people poking their noses in, and lines of communication being shut down, has not helped that healing process at all.

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  28. No it hasn’t.

    Which after talking to my Doc, learning more about how I process conflict and avoidance, and how I care for people’s needs and feelings over mine I’m finally angry. Three days now.

    Which is good. I need to be angry. Compassion only goes so far…

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  29. You will go through different stages of emotions anyway as you process where you are etc. Being made aware of why you feel like you do or have (like you have here with your Dr) will help with that because being aware of why you behave like you do is important. You feel angry but that’s not bad, and it’s still about how you process and channel it. This is good, you’re moving onto a different set of emotions and this is part of the healing process for you.

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Published by notyouraveragegirl363042

I randomly fell into online dating after 18 months single. Here's what happened.....