Myself and Chaolan play the same texting game. We’ll respond a couple of times but we don’t hang on to each other’s messages. Sometimes our responses take two days to come through. He is also super busy, and I am too laid back to care at this stage. We’re not afraid of letting messages be flagged as read, and then buggering off to do something else before answering. It’s one of my faults and it annoys the hell out of people. I don’t actually mind when people do it to me. So I wasn’t pissed at him.
This on face value could have been a good sign or a bad one but I went with the notion that he had the same attitude as me. There was no point in reading into it. Chaolan’s early messages on Tinder were complimentary and enthusiastic but there were still response time gaps so nothing had changed.
On Whatsapp his tone changed. I think he just loosened up. I saw something a bit different but I wasn’t sure if I was just reading his messages incorrectly. I could have been looking at a dry sense of humour or a dickhead. You have to be really careful with tone when all you have is the occasional emoticon for clarification (I find them very useful for clearing up any potential misunderstandings in messages). So I went with the former.
It was one of those situations that was only going to resolve itself with a meet because he had said enough to intrigue me and had possibly dropped a couple of hints that suggested something really interesting could be waiting. And so Sunday came around. We met in town and headed to an independent cafe and supped tea, coffee and hot chocolate for two hours and talked inanely about this and that.
So what did I think? Interesting. Very interesting. Interesting enough? I’m not sure. I am going to let him dictate the next move. Not surprisingly I got no message in the evening after we parted company, and as of today still nothing. In fact he didn’t even log into his Whatsapp until Monday evening. I should probably message him in case he’s thinking the same thing as me. In any case he turned out to be part dry sense of humour, and part (what some people would think of as) dickhead. I got it. He was funny, intelligent and didn’t follow the crowd.
Chaolan has my cynical attitude to life. He is very much, ‘You don’t like me? Okay bye.’ That’s me to a T. I don’t suffer fools gladly. It is one of my strongest characteristics. I don’t let people drag me down. He is the same. So personality wise I am attracted to him. However, I don’t necessarily think this is a good thing and I don’t necessarily think this is ‘attraction’ but more, safety in numbers – finding someone who ‘gets it’ is rare. We have to stick to together and these are small elements of my personality that most people don’t get because a lot of people would rather have sloppy friends than no friends. The problem is, that there is no balance with two cynical people ranting about the world together. I’ve done that before. I know the outcome. You actually drag each other down. He also has a bad boy past, though he has cleaned up his act and he was quick to point this out. I see red flags fluttering.
In any case, I am going to see where this goes. He would be an awesome friend if we’d met at work or similar. But of course we started out directly on Tinder, so that’s never going to be the case. Watch this space. Possibly.